Punches 1 - 2 oz DeKuyper® Sour Apple Pucker schnapps
1 - 2 oz Bacardi® 151 rum
12 oz can Pepsi® cola
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Africa
Travel
Two shoe salespeople were
sent to Africa
to open up new markets. Three days after arriving, one
salesperson
called the office and said, "I'm returning on the next
flight.
Can't sell shoes here. Everybody goes barefoot."
At the same time the
other salesperson sent an email to the factory,
telling "The
prospects are unlimited. Nobody wears shoes here!"
A man walks into a bar and
says, "Bartender, give me two shots."
Bartender says, "You want them
both now or one at a time?" The guy
says," Oh, I want them both
now. One's for me and one's for this
little guy here," and he pulls
a tiny three inch man out of his pocket.
The bartender asks "He
can drink?"
"Oh, sure. He can drink."
So the bartender
pours the shots and sure enough, the little guy drinks
it all up.
"That's amazing" says the bartender. "What else can he do, can
he
walk?"
The man flicks a quarter down to the end of the
bar and says, "Hey,
Jake. Go get that." The little guy runs down to
the end of the bar and
picks up the quarter. Then he runs back down
and gives it to the man.
The bartender is in total shock.
"That's amazing" he says, "what
else can he do? Does he talk?"
The man says "Sure he talks, hey, Jake, tell him about that time w
e
were in Africa and you made fun of that witch doctor's
powers!"
What's the difference between
an African
elephant and an Indian elephant ?
About 3,000 miles !
"Careful with fire" is good advice we know.
"Careful with words" is ten times doubly so. William Carleton
"Know thyself," said the old philosopher, "improve thyself," saith the new. Our great object in time is not to waste our passions and gifts on the things external that we must leave behind, but that we cultivate within us all that we can carry into the et Edward Bulwer-Lytton
. . . .When I am, as it were, completely myself, entirely alone, and of good cheer - say traveling in a carriage, or walking after a good meal, or during the night when I cannot sleep - it is on such occasions that my ideas flow best, and most abundantly. Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart