Other Drinks 2 oz Jim Beam® bourbon whiskey
6 oz Sierra Mist® soda
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Africa
Travel
A Software Engineer, a Hardware Engineer and a
Branch
Manager were on their way to a meeting. They were driving
down a steep
mountain road when suddenly the brakes on their car
failed. The car careened
almost out of control down the road, bouncing
off the crash barriers,
until it miraculously ground to a halt
scraping along the mountainside.
The car's occupants, shaken but
unhurt, now had a problem: they were
stuck halfway down a mountain in a
car with no brakes. What were they to
do?
"I know," said the
Branch Manager, "Let's have a meeting, propose a
Vision, formulate
a Mission Statement, define some Goals, and by a
process of
Continuous Improvement find a solution to the Critical Problems,
and we
can be on our way."
"No, no," said the Hardware Engineer, "That
will take far too long,
and besides, that method has never worked
before. I've got my Swiss
Army knife with me, and in no time a
t all I can strip down the car's
braking system, isolate the
fault, fix it, and we can be on our way."
"Well," said the Software
Engineer, "Before we do anything, I think
we should push the car
back up the road and see if it happens
again."
Bill Gates suddenly dies and finds himself
face to face with God. God stood over Bill Gates and said, "Well Bill,
I'm really confused on this one. It's a tough decision; I'm not
sure
whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you helped
society
enormously by putting a computer in almost every home in
America, yet you
also created that ghastly Windows '95 among other
indiscretions. I
believe I'll do something I've never done before;
I'll let you decide
where you want to go."
Bill pushed up
his glasses, looked up at God and replied, "Could you
briefly
explain the difference between the two?" Looking slightly
puzzled, God
said, "Better yet, why don't I let you visit both places
briefly,
then you can make your decision. Which do you choose to see first,
Heaven or Hell?"
Bill played with his pocket protector for a
moment, then looked back at
God and said, "I think I'll try Hell f
irst." So, with a flash of
lightning and a cloud of smoke, Bill
Gates went to Hell.
When he materialized in Hell, Bill looked
around. It was a beautiful
and clean place, a bit warm, with sandy
beaches and tall mountains, clear
skies, pristine water, and beautiful
women frolicking about. A smile
came across Bill's face as he took
in a deep breath of the clean air.
"This is great," he thought, "if
this is Hell, I can't wait to see
heaven."
Within seconds
of his thought, another flash of lightning and a cloud
of smoke
appeared, and Bill was off to Heaven. Heaven was a place high
above the
clouds, where angels were drifting about playing their harps
and
singing in a beautiful chorus. It was a very nice place, Bill
thought, but not as enticing as Hell.
Bill looked up, cupped his hands
around his mouth and yelled for God
and Bill Gates was sent to Hell
for eternity.
Time passed, and God decided to check on t
he late billionaire to see
how he was progressing in Hell. When he
got there, he found Bill Gates
shackled to a wall in a dark cave
amid bone thin men and tongues of fire,
being burned and tortured by
demons.
"So, how is everything going?" God asked.
Bill
responded with a crackling voice filled with anguish and
disappointment, "This is awful! It's nothing like the Hell I visited the first
time!! I can't believe this is happening! What happened to the other
place....with the beaches and the mountains and the beautiful
women?
"That was the demo," replied God.
A Software Engineer, a
Hardware Engineer and a Branch
Manager were on their way to a meeting.
They were driving down a
steep mountain road when suddenly the brakes
on their car failed. The
car careened almost out of control down the
road, bouncing off the
crash barriers, until it miraculously ground to a
halt scraping
along the mountainside. The car's occupants, shaken but
unhurt, now
had a problem: they were stuck halfway down a mountain in a
car with
no brakes. What were they to do?
"I know," said the Branch
Manager, "Let's have a meeting, propose a
Vision, formulate a Mission
Statement, define some Goals, and by a
process of Continuous
Improvement find a solution to the Critical Problems,
and we can be on our
way."
"No, no," said the Hardware Engineer, "That will take far
too long,
and besides, that method has never worked before. I
've got my Swiss
Army knife with me, and in no time at all I can
strip down the car's
braking system, isolate the fault, fix it,
and we can be on our way."
"Well," said the Software Engineer,
"Before we do anything, I think
we should push the car back up the
road and see if it happens
again."
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Lao-tzu
A little one shall become a thousand, and a small one a strong nation. Bible
A picture is worth a thousand words. An interface is worth a thousand pictures. Ben Shneiderman