Shots & Shooters 1 package orange jello
1 cup hot water
1 cup vanilla liqueur
Map
Africa
Travel
A ragged individual stranded for several months
on a small desert island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean one day
noticed a bottle lying in the sand with a piece of paper in it.
Rushing to
the bottle, he pulled out the cork and with shaking hands
withdrew the
message.
"Due to lack of maintenance," he read,
"we regretfully have found it
necessary to cancel your e-mail
account."
The plumber was working in a house when the lady of
the house said to him, "Will it be alright if I have a bath while
you're having your lunch?"
"It's okay with me lady," said the
plumber, "as long as you don't
splash my sandwiches."
While crossing the US-Mexican border on his
bicycle, the man was stopped by a guard who pointed to two sacks the
man
had on his shoulders. "What's in the bags?", asked the
guard.
"Sand," said the cyclist.
"Get them off - we'll take a
look," said the guard.
The Cyclist did as he was told, emptied the
bags, and proving they
contained nothing but sand, reloaded the
bags, put them on his shoulders
and continued across the border.
Two weeks later, the same thing happened. Again the guard demanded
to
see the two bags, which again contained nothing but sand. This
went on
every week for six months, until one day the cyclist with the
sand bags
failed to appear.
A few days later, the guard
happened to meet the cyclist downtown.
"Say friend, you sure had us
crazy", said the guard. "We knew you were
smuggling something across
the border. I won't say a word - but what is
it you were smu
ggling?" "Bicycles!"
A love of tradition has never weakened a nation, indeed it has strengthened nations in their hour of peril; but the new view must come, the world must roll forward. Sir Winston Churchill
Any reviewer who expresses rage and loathing for a novel is preposterous. He or she is like a person who has put on full armor and attacked a hot fudge sundae. Kurt Vonnegut
Approach each new problem not with a view of finding what you hope will be there, but to get the truth, the realities that must be grappled with. You may not like what you find. In that case you are entitled to try to change it. But do not deceive yoursel Bernard M. Baruch